Desperation had done funny things to Lady Katherine Wilcox’s insides. A month ago she would never have considered defying a single one of her father’s many edicts. She would have docilely accepted her lot in life, smiled and done her duty to her family by marrying as well as she possibly could. As the only daughter, only child of an old and grand family, it was up to her to live up to the expectations of her sire and cement their good standing in society.
But she would not be marrying Lord Ames if she could capture the attentions of another, more admirable fellow. She would give herself to a poor man who cared for her, even if he be a chimney sweep, rather than face a future with an overweight spouse who smelled of mackerel and pinched her bum very hard when her father was not paying attention.
She was even desperate enough to consider following the promptings of the anonymous note that had been slipped into her hand as she forced her way through the densely packed crowd at tonight’s society ball, slipping away from her hateful companion for the first time that evening.
Now, as she lingered in the Freznicks’ retiring room, trying to decide whether she was brave enough to risk her reputation on so flimsy an entreaty, her heart beat a rapid staccato. She had no idea who had placed the note into her hand and disappeared immediately after.
No one around her had met her gaze with any form of recognition.
Kate squinted at the bold writing again.
Accept Lord Standish when he asks for your hand and all your dreams will come true.
She pressed her lips together. That was a problem. Lord Standish was titled but had pockets to let, and he’d given her no indication that marriage was his goal where she was concerned.
His twin, however, was indecently wealthy and equally bold as he whispered of pleasures they might share if she would sneak away with him.
The brothers had a reputation for breaking hearts wherever they went. What was worse, half the time she could not tell the difference between Albert, Lord Standish and his twin, Lord Archibald, with absolute surety. If not for the signet ring Lord Standish wore, there was no sure way to tell them apart.
Over the past weeks, she’d begun to suspect they switched places and roles on occasion. It was a subtle thing, however. A sudden appreciation for a musical performance when on previous occasions the earl had appeared utterly bored. So, if she was asked by Standish, how was she to determine with any certainty that it was really him she’d be accepting?
Yet, for all their smiles and wicked whispers, she preferred them above any other gentleman in society. They might have touched her in a way most proper ladies would find inexcusable on occasion, but they had never made her feel she was wrong to enjoy their advances. It was beyond thrilling when their hands strayed beyond her elbow and waistline on occasion.
At first, she had ignored their caresses. Deciding not to create a scene that would embarrass her family and herself. Thankfully no one else had detected their actions so far, but that fever-bright light in their eyes had hinted they both knew what they did to her had caused her heart to race. She was attracted to two men in ways an unmarried woman should not be.
She should by rights prefer Lord Standish, the earl, over his brother, the spare. But Kate feared she couldn’t ever choose between them. They were exactly the type of gentlemen that set her heart to racing, they even seemed to like women whereas Lord Ames delighted in torturing her.
Kate perhaps foolishly looked forward to her next encounter with the twins, proper and improper, too.
She fervently wished the note she held could be true. Liking them both too much was going to get her into trouble if she couldn’t suppress her feelings soon.
Kate groaned and then fluttered her fan before her mouth to cool her face quickly. The companion would find her soon. There was no need to announce her frustrated state of mind to the companion her father had saddled her with when she’d first come out. The woman had the instincts of a bloodhound. Mama had apparently not been trusted to keep scoundrels away from Lord Aberdeen’s only daughter.
But the bulk of her frustration tonight stemmed from the fact that the man her father promoted for her to marry was almost three times her age, and his lascivious overtures were only increasing the longer they were acquainted. She shuddered. She could not marry a man older than her parents and suffer his cruel attentions for the rest of her life. It was utterly unthinkable.
She stared down at the paper again, noting that the penmanship was strong, and undoubtedly made by a male hand. Her way seemed clear to make a match with Lord Standish, but such a promise was too good to be true. She could not be certain Standish, or his brother, had marriage on his mind when they thought of her really. They’d never spoken of it.
These instructions could have been given to her for mischief alone, sent from another debutant to ensure Kate made a fool of herself and thus married no one. The marriage mart was hell on friendships, especially when there were so few handsome lords to impress this season. Kate had witnessed some shocking behavior inflicted on nice girls by others who schemed to catch the notice of the same gentlemen. She had been overlooked for such antics herself so far, thankfully. She wished someone might set their cap for Lord Ames, though, and take him far away.
Kate read the note again, committed the words to her memory, and then ripped the damning instructions into tiny pieces. She shoved the torn shreds into the palm of her glove, hiding the contents until she might find a fire to dispose of the paper later.
The door creaked open. “Thank heavens I found you,” her mother cried, rushing in. Lady Aberdeen hugged her close and then peered into her face. “I’d begun to think you’d run away.”
“I wouldn’t do that to you.”
“Where is your companion?”
“We became lost in the crowd.”
Mama sighed and hugged her again then cupped her face, looking deep into her eyes. Her brows drew together in a frown. “What’s happened to upset you?”
Mama knew a marriage to Lord Ames was the last thing she wanted. But even if Kate had her mother’s support, she was still just as powerless as Kate. Papa placed little importance on making his wife or daughter happy. He cared only for his own importance and position in society.
“Mama, I was offered advice tonight, but I needed some peace to think about it first,” Kate confessed haltingly. “A note said I should set my cap for Lord Standish as my husband.”
Her mother’s face grew pinched. “He is the worst of a bad bunch, not even accepted into Almack’s since he’s penniless, and that brother of his creates scandal wherever he goes. You should not be communicating with anyone connected to him. You’ve heard your father’s views on Lord Standish.”
“The message wasn’t from him, Mama.” Kate took a deep breath. In her two seasons, she’d never hidden her feelings about the gentlemen she favored from her mother. Many were scoundrels but some, like Standish and his brother, appealed tremendously. “But it suggested I should marry him when he asks.”
“When he asks?” Her mother blinked rapidly. “My darling, your father would never consent to so poor a match. He might be titled but they say he’s utterly dependent on his brother’s larger purse! Your father has made no bones about his low opinion of the pair.”
“I know.” Kate braced herself to voice an idea that had persisted and grown in strength over the past weeks. “Perhaps it is time Papa’s opinion was ignored. If Lord Standish—an earl from a distinguished family, mind you—could be interested in offering for me, I would be a fool to ignore any offer from him. He’s much more to my taste than Lord Ames. Closer in age, too. I am confident I could be happy with him.”
“Happy but not prosperous,” Mama reminded her but then frowned. Mama had spent her entire marriage outwardly doing exactly what her husband demanded. Even if she didn’t like it. Even when she was made to drop friendships because of his whims and tantrums. This was the first time in Kate’s memory that her mother appeared to be actually considering a little rebellion.
Kate held her breath, hoping that Mama would defy her husband at last and spare Kate an equally unhappy marriage and future.
Eventually, her mother looked up and nodded. Her face set in determined lines. “Are you sure this is what you want? He is handsome, but poor. Overlooked for invitations to many events. You might never attend Almack’s again.”
“He has also been very kind and polite to both of us in the past.” Kate grasped her mother’s hand. “It must be him, Mama. I think I would rather have the scandalous Lord Standish as a husband than anyone Papa called friend.”
Although her words sounded confident, a pang of worry settled in her stomach. She liked both twin brothers equally. She could not have both, so she had no choice but to choose the eldest. It made more sense to accept a proposal from Lord Standish. He might not always be impoverished, and she would eventually learn to ignore the way Archibald’s knowing smiles tugged at her senses and favor only her husband. A match with Lord Standish might serve her mother well, too. He had always made time to speak to Mama kindly, no matter how much Mama might disapprove of his reputation.
She drew her mother into a tight hug and then turned to the mirror. Her eyes were bright with excitement, her dark hair perfectly styled. She had dressed modestly tonight, expecting to encounter Lord Ames. The gown she wore hid her charms, but one little tug here and there and the tops of her breasts could be clearly seen. This was perhaps the best she could do in these trying circumstances, and she hoped her effort to appear less prudish might snare herself the husband she really wanted.
Kate gathered her courage and linked her arm through her mother’s. “I’m ready.”
Mama frowned. “Your father will be violently opposed to the match, Katherine,” she warned. “I don’t know that you will have an easy time.”
Kate was well aware of the hurdles she faced in making a scandalous match to an unpopular earl. Father was used to getting his own way and would undoubtedly lash out at any disobedience. She turned to her mother. “I hope Papa does not take his bad mood out on you.”
“Don’t worry about me, worry about yourself.” Her mother winced. “I won’t stop you, but I should have prepared you better for what that sort of man may want from his wife. They say all sorts of nonsense about Standish’s predilections, but I’m sure he will mend his ways in a proper marriage to you.”
Kate flushed at the thought of being alone with Lord Standish.
